Are you a food snob? Then let me be the first to tell you that you SUCK. There are few things more irritating than a know-it-all food snob, especially when their attention is focused on MY food.
Be advised that there is a distinction between foodies and food snobs. Foodies are food enthusiasts. They enjoy trying new things and have a tendency to be the "fashionistas" of the culinary world, drifting with the ever flowing current of food trends. At times, foodies can be a bit annoying, too, but at least they have good intentions. If goat cheese is "in", they'll probably expect it to be incorporated into every menu item. Food snobs, on the other hand, are married to brand names and believe that the only way to get something of quality is by paying a lot of money for it. Food snobs enjoy pointing out every flaw they think your food has and have no qualms about explaining to you - the chef / professional - how it should be done.
I typically ignore food snobs because let's face it, I have a short fuse and could see myself telling one to take his opinion and shove it. However, a couple weeks ago, a food snob snuck up on me and I didn't even see him coming. He was disguised as a return customer happily coming back along with his partner to buy some more of my pasta sauces. The man loooooves my pasta sauces (or so he said), so clearly he has good taste, right? Anybody??
Everything was going well. He purchased two sauces and then decided to order a couple paninis. The partner ordered one of my most popular ones that I call The Gaucho, which has roast beef, my homemade chimichurri sauce, provolone cheese, and peperonata (marinated Italian peppers), which is one the antipastos I prepare, all grilled on ciabatta bread. The food snob ordered The Milanese, which has turkey breast, peperonata, provolone, and pesto aioli (fancy word for pesto mixed with mayonnaise) on ciabatta bread. I got the Gaucho onto the grill and starting working on the Milanese, all the while the food snob was watching me like a hawk despite me having invited him to have a seat several times.
I popped the Milanese on the grill and move on to some crepes for another customer when my assistant tells me he overheard the food snob complaining about his panini. Mind you, he still hasn't gotten it yet. Apparently, he had an issue with the brand of turkey I was using. According to his comments, it's a terrible brand, but he's just going to deal with it because he had already ordered it. Of course, at this point I already knew that there's going to be trouble. It began with a complaint about the panini being too dry, nevermind the pesto aioli and all the juices from the marinated peppers.
They finished up and I thought that I was going to get away without having to hear any more complaints when he approaches me to have the turkey discussion. Dammit! He goes on and on about how my brand is awful and that I really should consider using Boar's Head instead. He continues by criticizing my "roasted peppers" and tells me that the white vinegar I use in them is too overpowering and blah blah blah (I tuned out after he called my beloved antipasto of marinated peppers 'roasted peppers'). He wraps up the endless critique with, "Your sauces are delicious, but I'm sorry to tell you, I'm not impressed with your paninis. You should really work on that." Why couldn't that duck that loves to fly into the market and crap in vendor's booths appear at that moment and use this man's head for target practice? Where's that damn duck when you need it?!
It took every ounce of self-control to look at him with a smile and thank him for his feedback... and then I proceeded to calmly explain to him how wrong he was. What? Did you really think I was going take that laying down? I defended the brand I usedand explained how the packaging is beneficial for the open market environment. The fact that we only open on the weekends makes it challenging to hold food for extended periods, so the small portion packaging is essential for keeping the ingredients fresh. Furthermore, Boar's Head turkey breast, although I agree is a superior brand, costs about $10 per pound. How would he suggest that I maintain my paninis at $6.25 if I'm using a $10/lb turkey breast that would have to be discarded each weekend? Hmmmm? (He actually agreed with me on this part - points for me!). Finally, as for the peppers, it's not white vinegar, it's red wine vinegar and the reason it tastes like that is because it's a traditional antipasto - it's supposed to taste like that. Did you know that food snob? Well, did you?! Oh, it doesn't come in a jar with a familiar label? Of course it doesn't, fool, any foodie would know that.
Being the customer service oriented chef that I am, I apologized for the inconvenience and invited him back in the hopes that he'd give me an opportunity to make it up to him. *Sigh* What can I say? Despite having imagined the duck plus a dozen pigeons shitting on him the way he was shitting on me, I'm still in the hospitality business. When all is said and done, sucking up a little bit goes a long way in this industry. But don't mess with me again... beware food snobs, we chefs have ways to mess with you (all hygenic, I promise) and you'll be none the wiser. And that's all I have to say about that.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Conflicted - Part II
I figured it would only be fair to offer a follow up, so here's the cheese. The dirty deed was done as kindly as I could possibly muster. The call was made before the weekend so that a trip wasn't made all the way to the market simply to receive some bad news and be sent home. I was trying to be considerate since I HATE it when a boss makes you go to work on a Monday morning just to give you that news. I've always wondered why they don't just do it on a Friday afternoon if they already know what they're going to do?
Anyway, I thanked her for her services and explained that the numbers simply weren't adding up. In addition, I decided to close that booth for the weekend and consolidate everything into one booth for the meantime. The last thing I expected was to see her at the market on Sunday strolling up our aisle pretending to be engrossed reading her Nook attempting to ignore me. Of course I greeted her as she walked past me, since I'm a grown-up. She pretended to be somewhat surprised that she had found herself in front of our booth, gave me a half-assed greeting while fidgeting with her gadget, and couldn't even finish her sentence before moving on. Clearly she just wanted me to know that she was in the market since there are plenty of alternate routes she could have taken and there's nobody else in my aisle to greet (with the exception of the two extreme corners, we're alone on our section of the aisle).
Afterwards, CP told me that she went by the other booth and bought a slushy from him, all the while sneering at the fact that we had increased the price by $0.50 (as she already knew we planned to do) and ignoring his greeting. Then she informed him that four other vendors had offered her a job in the market at which point he just said, "Good for you!". What else did she expect him to say?
One thing I've learned the hard way throughout my professional career is not to burn bridges. It's a small world out there and you never know who knows who, and this is a lesson she will soon learn, as well. Overall, a lot of good has come through this experience. First of all, it reinforced the understanding that friendship and business can not co-exist. There's time for friendship and time for business, but they must be maintained separately. Secondly, trust my instinct. If something feels "off", it's probably because it is. Finally, don't be afraid or ashamed to protect my own interests. I've worked hard to build this business, and although it may not be a Fortune 500 company (yet), I've poured my heart and soul into it. If someone or something is not working in the best interest of my company, they have got to go. No regrets.
Anyway, I thanked her for her services and explained that the numbers simply weren't adding up. In addition, I decided to close that booth for the weekend and consolidate everything into one booth for the meantime. The last thing I expected was to see her at the market on Sunday strolling up our aisle pretending to be engrossed reading her Nook attempting to ignore me. Of course I greeted her as she walked past me, since I'm a grown-up. She pretended to be somewhat surprised that she had found herself in front of our booth, gave me a half-assed greeting while fidgeting with her gadget, and couldn't even finish her sentence before moving on. Clearly she just wanted me to know that she was in the market since there are plenty of alternate routes she could have taken and there's nobody else in my aisle to greet (with the exception of the two extreme corners, we're alone on our section of the aisle).
Afterwards, CP told me that she went by the other booth and bought a slushy from him, all the while sneering at the fact that we had increased the price by $0.50 (as she already knew we planned to do) and ignoring his greeting. Then she informed him that four other vendors had offered her a job in the market at which point he just said, "Good for you!". What else did she expect him to say?
One thing I've learned the hard way throughout my professional career is not to burn bridges. It's a small world out there and you never know who knows who, and this is a lesson she will soon learn, as well. Overall, a lot of good has come through this experience. First of all, it reinforced the understanding that friendship and business can not co-exist. There's time for friendship and time for business, but they must be maintained separately. Secondly, trust my instinct. If something feels "off", it's probably because it is. Finally, don't be afraid or ashamed to protect my own interests. I've worked hard to build this business, and although it may not be a Fortune 500 company (yet), I've poured my heart and soul into it. If someone or something is not working in the best interest of my company, they have got to go. No regrets.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Conflicted
I've always wanted to be my own boss, or in charge of whatever I'm doing at the very least. Now the phrase "be careful what you wish for because you might just get it", is coming back to haunt me. Running a business certainly has its pros and cons, but I have found that the biggest pro is also the biggest con, and that's dealing with human resources.
The need to hire people is a good thing, it means the business is growing. However, managing a group of teenagers is the equivalent of trying to herd cats at times. They're fearless, cocky, arrogant, and they already know it all, so what's there to learn? Although they've gone through most of high school, they still haven't gone through the school of hard knocks taught by Prof. Life Experience.
I'm conflicted because when I acquired the most recent annex to my business, I also acquired a new employee. I was excited about it at first because I figured what could be a better deal than to acquire someone who has been with the business since its inception that already knew the operation inside and out, was already familiar with the market and the vendors, and was someone who had been my customer and "work" friend for the past 6 months. Little did I know the drama that was about to ensue.
I'll admit, I've always struggled to keep my temper in check. It doesn't take much to set me off and get me to run my mouth, which my new employee soon found out. Unlike her previous boss, I have not been shy about pointing out the things about her behavior, attitude, and administrative tasks that need to be corrected. Of course, it began nicely at first by explaining what my expectations were, what our current policies are, and what needed to be done. It's a very simple job and for the most part, nothing changed much from what she had been doing before, so I didn't think it would be an issue.
Well, evidently, not texting or playing with your cell phone, greeting and engaging with customers, smiling, offering samples, keeping the 8 x 8 ft space tidy, staying inside the booth, using the radio to call for breaks or extra supplies, and taking inventory is a bit much. Since leaving her in charge of the main booth, sales have dropped to less than 30% of what the previous owners were generating. In three short weekends I have already busted her:
So the time has come to do something I'd hoped I would never have to do, and that's to fire someone. I know enough about her personal situation to feel sorry for her, but I can't continue to employ someone who isn't producing anything for my business. As a business owner, it's my responsibility to make sure everyone gets paid, but who guarantees that I'll get paid? Nobody... and I've come to the realization that nobody really cares, either. I've already found a replacement, but I really don't want to deal with this awkward confrontation. I suppose that each time I'm feeling a little conflicted, I should remember how screwed I am. Yep, that oughta put things in perspective.
The need to hire people is a good thing, it means the business is growing. However, managing a group of teenagers is the equivalent of trying to herd cats at times. They're fearless, cocky, arrogant, and they already know it all, so what's there to learn? Although they've gone through most of high school, they still haven't gone through the school of hard knocks taught by Prof. Life Experience.
I'm conflicted because when I acquired the most recent annex to my business, I also acquired a new employee. I was excited about it at first because I figured what could be a better deal than to acquire someone who has been with the business since its inception that already knew the operation inside and out, was already familiar with the market and the vendors, and was someone who had been my customer and "work" friend for the past 6 months. Little did I know the drama that was about to ensue.
I'll admit, I've always struggled to keep my temper in check. It doesn't take much to set me off and get me to run my mouth, which my new employee soon found out. Unlike her previous boss, I have not been shy about pointing out the things about her behavior, attitude, and administrative tasks that need to be corrected. Of course, it began nicely at first by explaining what my expectations were, what our current policies are, and what needed to be done. It's a very simple job and for the most part, nothing changed much from what she had been doing before, so I didn't think it would be an issue.
Well, evidently, not texting or playing with your cell phone, greeting and engaging with customers, smiling, offering samples, keeping the 8 x 8 ft space tidy, staying inside the booth, using the radio to call for breaks or extra supplies, and taking inventory is a bit much. Since leaving her in charge of the main booth, sales have dropped to less than 30% of what the previous owners were generating. In three short weekends I have already busted her:
- Engrossed with her cell phone texting and ignoring customers on several occasions even after having prohibited texting while on the job.
- Leaving her booth to supposedly get more change or supplies despite having a radio. Which part of STAY IN YOUR BOOTH didn't you get the first 15 times? Even when she didn't work for us, she would wander from her booth to ours at which time CP and I would always tell her to go back to her booth.
- Insisting that it didn't matter if she left the booth because nobody was there anyway. How would she know if she's not there?
- Stereotyping customers by telling me after I had instructed her to greet someone and offer a sample, "I know the type. They're not going to buy anything". She's a mind reader now? Well, she was right. They weren't going to buy anything - from HER.
- Telling my mother, who is a sales expert and was teaching her some customer service and sales techniques, that she didn't like sales and was only there because she needed the job. That kind of sucks when your job is to sell stuff.
- Pretending to have done inventory when it hasn't been done. We did random audits and caught it. I guess it's kind of hard to miss when she's reporting there are 68 ice pops in the freezer when I know I only purchased 40 of them and it's been passed over from one day to the next to the next.
- Ignoring my direct instructions to do something. How many times do I need to tell you to clean the same thing? I had asked for the same thing to be done for 3 consecutive work days and it still hadn't been done. Of course, the final straw was when the owners of a local business that I want to affiliate myself with dropped by unannounced to check out the location. I had to do the best I could to strategically stand in front of the things I didn't want them to see in fear that they'd think I'm a slob. It was humiliating.
- Feeling entitled to come to me exasperated and upset questioning the reason CP and I made some decisions we chose to make that had nothing to do with her and arguing with me about it with dramatic fanfare in front of my other employee, customers, and whoever else may be passing by to hear it. That really pissed me off.
- Deliberately showing up late to a meeting I had scheduled a week before with coffee in hand when she's never been late before.
So the time has come to do something I'd hoped I would never have to do, and that's to fire someone. I know enough about her personal situation to feel sorry for her, but I can't continue to employ someone who isn't producing anything for my business. As a business owner, it's my responsibility to make sure everyone gets paid, but who guarantees that I'll get paid? Nobody... and I've come to the realization that nobody really cares, either. I've already found a replacement, but I really don't want to deal with this awkward confrontation. I suppose that each time I'm feeling a little conflicted, I should remember how screwed I am. Yep, that oughta put things in perspective.
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