It's difficult being a Christian in such a cynical world. I'm surrounded by people who thrive off of pretending not to care about anything and assuming that anyone who has faith or believes in God, or better yet, in Jesus Christ, is an idiot.
I find people who claim to have read the bible and still point out that God is a genocidal asshole (yes, someone did write this to me today, while implying that I'm a hypocrite) are ignorant and blind.
Here's the exact comment some people made to me on facebook after stating that people committing or threatening violent acts in the name of Christianity are the problem, not Christianity itself. This was in response to an article posted by a facebook / college acquaintance, DW.
TR: I'm assuming you've read at least some of the Old Testament, God was kind of a violence loving, genocidal asshole if you recall.
The problem with Christianity, and almost all religions in fact, is that there is always something within its readings that allow people to cherry pick what to follow and to justify ostracizing non-believers at best, committing acts of hate and violence at worst.
DW: Would you say the same thing if it was a Muslim or a Hindu making the threats or would you scrape it onto their religion?
Also, the incident at Passover, not to mention the flood and extermination of the Canaanites beg to agree that the Abrahamic God was a malevolent being guilty of innumerable crimes against humanity.
TR: And what of The Canaanites? The Fall of Jericho? The Amorites? These are just a few of the groups where God not only authorized the Hebrews to commit genocide, he demanded nothing less.
Are we still talking about the same God?
Ah yes, the rants and ramblings of ignorance in its full glory for the world to see. I used to dive right into these arguements to the extent that I'd get a headache and my blood pressure would practically go off the charts, but I've learned not to waste too much time on people like this. However, I do think it's important to speak up and say something whenever I see people attempting to insult God because even if the offender doesn't get it, there may be someone reading it who is teetering on the fine line between doubt and disbelief who may need to see someone take a stand for Christ to help reinforce their faith. By nature, people just want to fit in and they rarely like to go against the grain, especially when it comes to touchy feely subjects such as their spiritual beliefs. I don't care whether someone disapproves of my faith. If I lose a "friend", which has happened, then so be it. If I've lost customers, then God has provided new ones (not that I discuss my religion with customers, but I don't attempt to hide it, either).
Those of us who know Christ and have a relationship with God understand that the bible is not like any other novel that you can just open, read, and understand it. It's incredibly complex and could be impossible to fully digest and comprehend without the help of the holy spirit.
When I was younger, I attempted several times to read the bible. It was so confusing that I'd just get frustrated and give up. I never got past the first few chapters of Genesis and left it at that. Never once did it occur to me to pray for understanding and clarity before diving into the Word of God. Going to church used to be such a drag... more confusion, nothing made sense. Once again, it never occurred to me to go to God first.
Finally, after wandering for years in the "dessert", God got a firm grip on my heart and led me straight to him. It was as if He said enough is enough. No more gentle whispers and nudges, no more subtle signs, He just turned the volume UP, making it impossible for me to ignore Him. I was inexplicably compelled to accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior, and since that day forward, it's like a blindfold was removed from my eyes. It was immediate and instantaneous - I "GOT" IT!! Today I understand what was never understood, it was like developing a new sense or discovering a new instinct. I just knew stuff. I also knew there was a lot of stuff that I didn't know, couldn't know, and wouldn't know until I needed to know. Confusing? Yeah, I know.
This experience has been an amazing blessing and an uncomfortable burden at once. There is nothing better than having a relationship with Christ and there is nothing in my human experience that could ever compare. However, this relationship comes with a price in this fallen world. There are inevitable conflicts that arise with friends and strangers that can be heart breaking at times. I hate seeing people offend God. I hate seeing people being so flippant towards Him. Each time I read, watch, or listen to something that is so contrary to the truth I know about my heavenly father, it fills me with indignation and anger and it breaks my heart. I see these actions and realize that they really don't know what they're doing. They have no idea how grave their actions are. They don't realize that they are being manipulated by an enemy who does nothing but devise a million schemes to destroy us every moment of every day. They don't realize that the decisions they make here on earth will affect them for eternity.
I'm not trying to be preachy nor do I want to force anyone into committing to something that they're not prepared for, but I do feel compelled to tell the truth. The truth is that God is good and He loves us so much that He sent his only begotten son to this cruel world to save us (John 3:16). Everything He does is done for our good, even when we don't understand it. Furthermore, don't be misled, there is only one way to the father, and that is through the son. You can be the nicest person on the planet, participating in hundreds of charitable events, and helping thousands of people, but if you don't know Jesus, you're not going to heaven. There is nothing any of us will ever do that will earn us a first class ticket to heaven because it is a gift that is given to us through God's grace. If you receive the invitation, but fail to RSVP, you don't get to show up to the party and crash it later on.
Jesus didn't come to this planet for the righteous, He came to save all the misfits. If He offers you the gift of salvation, accept it for crying out loud! You're not expected to be perfect, you're just expected to be faithful. That's really all there is to it, in a nutshell.
If your pig-headed human logic wants to tell you that it's pointless and that there's no such thing as eternity, consider the fact that you could be wrong. What if you're wrong?? What if it's true? What harm would it do to open your heart and ask to be filled with the Holy Spirit and forgiven of all your sins? Seriously. What harm could come of it? Oh, sure, your ego may have a little bruising and your pride may be shot, but you'll be just fine and the reward will be sooooo worth it.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Saturday, June 18, 2011
It's Not Me, They Really Are Getting Dumber
Let's face it, if today's youth is the future of America, we're screwed. Sure, we were all kind of goofy when we were teens, but there was always a complete loser who served as an excellent example of what we didn't want to become, which sort of scared us back to our senses. Well, it worked on most of us, anyway. Now the goof to loser ratio is all off. Finding a goofy teen in a pile of losers is like finding a needle in a haystack.
Talking to most teens today will make you dumber by the minute. Seriously. Notice how your mind just numbs out after 3 minutes of their rambling about video games, reality shows about vapid stupid people, some viral YouTube video, the Hunger Force crew, who's hooking up with whom (why are they attempting to procreate for Pete's sake?!), how effed up drunk they got a couple days ago, or whatever other idiotic thing is rotting their minds nowadays. It's a disgrace to sound like such an old fart, but as someone who employs teens, I'm on the front lines of this battle. I'm the one who ultimately suffers the consequences of other people's shitty parenting and teaching abilities. The complete lack of responsibility, accountability, common sense, and self-pride in the quality of their work is astounding. I could add that the complete lack of respect is also astonishing, although I'll admit that for the most part, I've been pretty lucky in that department.
Worst of all, they're becoming stupid. No. There's no better word to describe it. For the most part, they're academically and socially stupid. I don't have children, so I typically avoid critiquing other people's parenting skills, but the fact is that the quality of modern parenting has become increasingly questionable at best. This being said, kids spend most of their day at school supposedly learning, so I must bring up the role of teachers in all of this. A teacher's job is not to raise your kids (although they do say that it takes a village to raise a child - or something like that), but it is their job to educate them and based on my interaction with these kids, I'm not impressed with the quality of their work at all.
School just let out earlier this week, so one of my assistants is looking for an additional job during the week days at the bequest of his mom. So he called me a couple days ago to request permission to list me as a reference and of course I accepted. Today at work I called his attention to numerous mistakes he had made and had him correct them, containing the urge to throw a shoe at him on several occasions. The laaaazzziiiinessss is unbearable, but that's another blog. When he sat down he told me everything was done, meanwhile I saw plenty that still needed to be completed and pointed it out. He responded, "Well, that's Andy's job". Oh hell no.
I called "Andy" over and told him what "Mandy" had said and asked him to please respond to Mandy (Andy and I had had this conversation several months before). So Andy happily told him, "Everything's your job and nobody's done until everything's done". I love that kid sometimes. Mandy replied, "Well, why do I always have to wash the dishes? Why can't Andy do it?" I had to explain that I didn't trust him to do what Andy does since I can't even trust him to do his main task correctly at closing time, which is to wash the dishes. Increased responsibility is typically accompanied by increased pay, but that has to be earned. Of course I proceeded to point out at least half a dozen problems in his station alone that should have been addressed during his shift. I love how he tried sneaking out of a specific project I had assigned to him by giving me the "Aw shucks, my mom just arrived so I have to go" face. Hold it right there super fly. Yo' mama can wait.
Then I asked Mandy, "When the people from that job you're applying for call me, is there something you want me to tell them or do you want me to tell them the truth?". He gave me a puzzled look so I repeated the question. Blank stare. "Because if you want me to tell the truth, I could say that you're punctual. Although, I should probably credit your step-dad for that, but still, you're typically punctual." That's when he interrupted me and asked what 'punctuality' means. My jaw dropped, but I told him that it means 'on time'. Keep in mind that this is a 16 year old high school sophomore we're talking about. Then I asked, "How can you not know the definition of 'punctuality'? What the hell are they teaching you kids nowadays?". He replied, "I don't know. I get like all A's without even trying". WHAAAAATTT????!!! What teacher would give this kid an "A"? He can't even figure out how to get the ice machine back on.... and he wants to be a computer programmer when he grows up. Just add water and push the button, genius! A chimp could figure this one out.
This is not my first encounter with teenage stupidity and laziness, but boy did this take me by surprise. How is it possible for an "A" student to make it to their junior year in high school without knowing the definition of a 4th grade vocabulary word? Let's not even get into the spelling. Oh, if you only saw the grocery list he made for me last week. I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry due to his deplorable spelling. Here's a small sampling for your amusement:
I know there are many top notch teachers out there, but for every excellent teacher, there's 9 mediocre ones. If you're a teacher, don't let these kids slide by, you're not doing them, society, or yourselves any favors. If you're passing students with high scores when only a miracle should have helped them pass, then you're the biggest part of the problem. Yeah, they are lazy and obnoxious, but keep pushing them. Don't settle for mediocrity. Push them, discipline them, and be firm. Fail them if you must, but for crying out loud, no more free passes! Just remember, these are the people that are supposed to take care of you when you're an old fart in a retirement home. Scary thought, I know.
Talking to most teens today will make you dumber by the minute. Seriously. Notice how your mind just numbs out after 3 minutes of their rambling about video games, reality shows about vapid stupid people, some viral YouTube video, the Hunger Force crew, who's hooking up with whom (why are they attempting to procreate for Pete's sake?!), how effed up drunk they got a couple days ago, or whatever other idiotic thing is rotting their minds nowadays. It's a disgrace to sound like such an old fart, but as someone who employs teens, I'm on the front lines of this battle. I'm the one who ultimately suffers the consequences of other people's shitty parenting and teaching abilities. The complete lack of responsibility, accountability, common sense, and self-pride in the quality of their work is astounding. I could add that the complete lack of respect is also astonishing, although I'll admit that for the most part, I've been pretty lucky in that department.
Worst of all, they're becoming stupid. No. There's no better word to describe it. For the most part, they're academically and socially stupid. I don't have children, so I typically avoid critiquing other people's parenting skills, but the fact is that the quality of modern parenting has become increasingly questionable at best. This being said, kids spend most of their day at school supposedly learning, so I must bring up the role of teachers in all of this. A teacher's job is not to raise your kids (although they do say that it takes a village to raise a child - or something like that), but it is their job to educate them and based on my interaction with these kids, I'm not impressed with the quality of their work at all.
School just let out earlier this week, so one of my assistants is looking for an additional job during the week days at the bequest of his mom. So he called me a couple days ago to request permission to list me as a reference and of course I accepted. Today at work I called his attention to numerous mistakes he had made and had him correct them, containing the urge to throw a shoe at him on several occasions. The laaaazzziiiinessss is unbearable, but that's another blog. When he sat down he told me everything was done, meanwhile I saw plenty that still needed to be completed and pointed it out. He responded, "Well, that's Andy's job". Oh hell no.
I called "Andy" over and told him what "Mandy" had said and asked him to please respond to Mandy (Andy and I had had this conversation several months before). So Andy happily told him, "Everything's your job and nobody's done until everything's done". I love that kid sometimes. Mandy replied, "Well, why do I always have to wash the dishes? Why can't Andy do it?" I had to explain that I didn't trust him to do what Andy does since I can't even trust him to do his main task correctly at closing time, which is to wash the dishes. Increased responsibility is typically accompanied by increased pay, but that has to be earned. Of course I proceeded to point out at least half a dozen problems in his station alone that should have been addressed during his shift. I love how he tried sneaking out of a specific project I had assigned to him by giving me the "Aw shucks, my mom just arrived so I have to go" face. Hold it right there super fly. Yo' mama can wait.
Then I asked Mandy, "When the people from that job you're applying for call me, is there something you want me to tell them or do you want me to tell them the truth?". He gave me a puzzled look so I repeated the question. Blank stare. "Because if you want me to tell the truth, I could say that you're punctual. Although, I should probably credit your step-dad for that, but still, you're typically punctual." That's when he interrupted me and asked what 'punctuality' means. My jaw dropped, but I told him that it means 'on time'. Keep in mind that this is a 16 year old high school sophomore we're talking about. Then I asked, "How can you not know the definition of 'punctuality'? What the hell are they teaching you kids nowadays?". He replied, "I don't know. I get like all A's without even trying". WHAAAAATTT????!!! What teacher would give this kid an "A"? He can't even figure out how to get the ice machine back on.... and he wants to be a computer programmer when he grows up. Just add water and push the button, genius! A chimp could figure this one out.
This is not my first encounter with teenage stupidity and laziness, but boy did this take me by surprise. How is it possible for an "A" student to make it to their junior year in high school without knowing the definition of a 4th grade vocabulary word? Let's not even get into the spelling. Oh, if you only saw the grocery list he made for me last week. I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry due to his deplorable spelling. Here's a small sampling for your amusement:
- paper towals
- nautella
- gava jelly
- swiss chese
- chedder
- mozzeralla
- marinated pepers
I know there are many top notch teachers out there, but for every excellent teacher, there's 9 mediocre ones. If you're a teacher, don't let these kids slide by, you're not doing them, society, or yourselves any favors. If you're passing students with high scores when only a miracle should have helped them pass, then you're the biggest part of the problem. Yeah, they are lazy and obnoxious, but keep pushing them. Don't settle for mediocrity. Push them, discipline them, and be firm. Fail them if you must, but for crying out loud, no more free passes! Just remember, these are the people that are supposed to take care of you when you're an old fart in a retirement home. Scary thought, I know.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Managing Expectations
Occasionally I hear catch phrases that make me wonder who, just who the heck dreams this stuff up? One that gets to me is "managing expectations". If there's one thing I know it's that you can't manage anybody's expectations. It's impossible.
You may wonder how I've become such an authority on the subject and all I can say is that it's impossible to manage something you know little or nothing about. For instance, the fact that my husband has been pissed at me for the past couple days despite me being completely oblivious to the reason is a perfect example. At first he insisted it had nothing to do with me, he just had a lot on his mind. By this afternoon, at least he finally admitted, amongst many other things, several things I had said and / or done bothered himn. If I recall, he said that his cup was filling up drop by drop and it had finally spilled over. Needless to say, he's refusing to tell me what I actually did to piss him off. The only thing he cared to mention was that it was nothing that I specifically said or did, it was just me being me. If this is the case, how on earth am I supposed to manage that expectation? I still don't know what the hell happened! Perhaps I live in fantasy island, but up until yesterday I thought things were hunky dory considering all the challenges we typically deal with.
There's also a woman at the market who is incredibly pissed at me for reasons unknown to me until Sunday afternoon. It wasn't until this weekend that I noticed her odd behavior. According to my assistant, evidently it's my fault that she didn't get interviewed because I "stole her thunder". I had stopped by her booth to deliver her lunch when some girl with a camera man stopped by to greet her. I patiently waited to get paid (it turned out she had already paid when she placed the order, but I was unaware) and once they had stopped talking, I mentioned I had a food booth and the girl said she wanted to stop by to check it out. Now it's my fault that she wasn't interviewed, but I was. Can somebody say drama??
The bottom line is that it's impossible to manage people's expectations when you don't know what they are. It boils down to the fact that people frequently neglect to speak up and express their needs, hence expecting others to keep at it until they guess correctly. I know some of the things that irritate my husband, but I can never keep up with all his pet peeves and annoyances. I try my best to be personable and offer good food and service, but some people are difficult to please.
Therefore, I have concluded that "managing expectations" is a bunch of hooey. If you want your expectations to be met, then let them be known. Don't pussy foot around things of importance and bring problems and concerns up as they occur. Don't wait until your glass spills over before bringing problems to people's attention. Most importantly, don't have a passive aggressive "I plan to pretend to ignore you to get your attention until you realize I'm mad at you for some reason" attitude. That kind of behavior should be left behind in high school.
You may wonder how I've become such an authority on the subject and all I can say is that it's impossible to manage something you know little or nothing about. For instance, the fact that my husband has been pissed at me for the past couple days despite me being completely oblivious to the reason is a perfect example. At first he insisted it had nothing to do with me, he just had a lot on his mind. By this afternoon, at least he finally admitted, amongst many other things, several things I had said and / or done bothered himn. If I recall, he said that his cup was filling up drop by drop and it had finally spilled over. Needless to say, he's refusing to tell me what I actually did to piss him off. The only thing he cared to mention was that it was nothing that I specifically said or did, it was just me being me. If this is the case, how on earth am I supposed to manage that expectation? I still don't know what the hell happened! Perhaps I live in fantasy island, but up until yesterday I thought things were hunky dory considering all the challenges we typically deal with.
There's also a woman at the market who is incredibly pissed at me for reasons unknown to me until Sunday afternoon. It wasn't until this weekend that I noticed her odd behavior. According to my assistant, evidently it's my fault that she didn't get interviewed because I "stole her thunder". I had stopped by her booth to deliver her lunch when some girl with a camera man stopped by to greet her. I patiently waited to get paid (it turned out she had already paid when she placed the order, but I was unaware) and once they had stopped talking, I mentioned I had a food booth and the girl said she wanted to stop by to check it out. Now it's my fault that she wasn't interviewed, but I was. Can somebody say drama??
The bottom line is that it's impossible to manage people's expectations when you don't know what they are. It boils down to the fact that people frequently neglect to speak up and express their needs, hence expecting others to keep at it until they guess correctly. I know some of the things that irritate my husband, but I can never keep up with all his pet peeves and annoyances. I try my best to be personable and offer good food and service, but some people are difficult to please.
Therefore, I have concluded that "managing expectations" is a bunch of hooey. If you want your expectations to be met, then let them be known. Don't pussy foot around things of importance and bring problems and concerns up as they occur. Don't wait until your glass spills over before bringing problems to people's attention. Most importantly, don't have a passive aggressive "I plan to pretend to ignore you to get your attention until you realize I'm mad at you for some reason" attitude. That kind of behavior should be left behind in high school.
Friday, June 10, 2011
I Am What I Am
I've struggled with this and hate to admit it, but I think I'm an asshole. Have you ever met one of those super cheerful bubbly Christians? Well, I know plenty of 'em and comparing apples to apples... let's just say I'm a tart granny smith to their sweet red delicious variety. Sure I can come off as being very friendly and it's typically at least 95% authentic. Don't judge me, I work in hospitality and sometimes I have to be nice even when I'm not in the mood.
May God forgive me, but I can be so mean at times. Let's start with the road rage. Is there any one in South Florida I haven't flicked off or yelled at from the safety of my car with the windows rolled up? Mind you, I do this while listening to my favorite Christian music channel on my satellite radio. How often have I cut people off or refused to let someone cut in front of me? In my defense, though, you can't tell me you haven't let someone cut in front of you only for them to slam their brakes at the yellow light. Since when does yellow mean stop? It means go, go, GO FASTER you moron! But I digress...
Oh, and my poor customers. Some of you just make it so easy to mess with. Of all people, my customers should at least be untouchable by my jerkiness (I don't care if it's not a word, just go with it). But what am I supposed to do when I offer someone a sample and they respond, "I cook.". Oh c'mon!! Am I not supposed to respond with something snarky even if only the little voices inside my head hear it?
Should I even mention my profanity? I can't help myself, it's a curse. I try so hard to watch my language, but all it takes is listening to 2 minutes of any given Obama speech and it's only a matter of seconds before a boisterous, "WTF is he talking about??!", comes flying out of my mouth. And let me clarify, I don't abbreviate when I'm talking out loud.
So. What do I plan to do about this? Well, last night I began by allowing someone to pass in front of me. Also, I didn't flip out even when some chick decided to leave her cart full of her extreme couponing gerber jars in the middle of the aisle at the grocery store. She even copped an attitude with me after I asked her oblivious husband to excuse me and patiently waited before beginning to move the cart to the side myself so I could pass before she snatched it and moved it herself (boy was she pissed, I heard her tearing her hubby a new one at the cash register).
Overall, the plan consists of just making an effort to be nice and courteous even towards fellow assholes. This is going to be tough, especially since some of the meanest things are the thoughts that go through my head that few are ever privy to, but I know. I knooow.
May God forgive me, but I can be so mean at times. Let's start with the road rage. Is there any one in South Florida I haven't flicked off or yelled at from the safety of my car with the windows rolled up? Mind you, I do this while listening to my favorite Christian music channel on my satellite radio. How often have I cut people off or refused to let someone cut in front of me? In my defense, though, you can't tell me you haven't let someone cut in front of you only for them to slam their brakes at the yellow light. Since when does yellow mean stop? It means go, go, GO FASTER you moron! But I digress...
Oh, and my poor customers. Some of you just make it so easy to mess with. Of all people, my customers should at least be untouchable by my jerkiness (I don't care if it's not a word, just go with it). But what am I supposed to do when I offer someone a sample and they respond, "I cook.". Oh c'mon!! Am I not supposed to respond with something snarky even if only the little voices inside my head hear it?
Should I even mention my profanity? I can't help myself, it's a curse. I try so hard to watch my language, but all it takes is listening to 2 minutes of any given Obama speech and it's only a matter of seconds before a boisterous, "WTF is he talking about??!", comes flying out of my mouth. And let me clarify, I don't abbreviate when I'm talking out loud.
So. What do I plan to do about this? Well, last night I began by allowing someone to pass in front of me. Also, I didn't flip out even when some chick decided to leave her cart full of her extreme couponing gerber jars in the middle of the aisle at the grocery store. She even copped an attitude with me after I asked her oblivious husband to excuse me and patiently waited before beginning to move the cart to the side myself so I could pass before she snatched it and moved it herself (boy was she pissed, I heard her tearing her hubby a new one at the cash register).
Overall, the plan consists of just making an effort to be nice and courteous even towards fellow assholes. This is going to be tough, especially since some of the meanest things are the thoughts that go through my head that few are ever privy to, but I know. I knooow.
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