Managing Expectations

Occasionally I hear catch phrases that make me wonder who, just who the heck dreams this stuff up? One that gets to me is "managing expectations". If there's one thing I know it's that you can't manage anybody's expectations. It's impossible.

You may wonder how I've become such an authority on the subject and all I can say is that it's impossible to manage something you know little or nothing about. For instance, the fact that my husband has been pissed at me for the past couple days despite me being completely oblivious to the reason is a perfect example. At first he insisted it had nothing to do with me, he just had a lot on his mind. By this afternoon, at least he finally admitted, amongst many other things, several things I had said and / or done bothered himn. If I recall, he said that his cup was filling up drop by drop and it had finally spilled over. Needless to say, he's refusing to tell me what I actually did to piss him off. The only thing he cared to mention was that it was nothing that I specifically said or did, it was just me being me. If this is the case, how on earth am I supposed to manage that expectation? I still don't know what the hell happened! Perhaps I live in fantasy island, but up until yesterday I thought things were hunky dory considering all the challenges we typically deal with.

There's also a woman at the market who is incredibly pissed at me for reasons unknown to me until Sunday afternoon. It wasn't until this weekend that I noticed her odd behavior. According to my assistant, evidently it's my fault that she didn't get interviewed because I "stole her thunder".  I had stopped by her booth to deliver her lunch when some girl with a camera man stopped by to greet her. I patiently waited to get paid (it turned out she had already paid when she placed the order, but I was unaware) and once they had stopped talking, I mentioned I had a food booth and the girl said she wanted to stop by to check it out. Now it's my fault that she wasn't interviewed, but I was. Can somebody say drama??

The bottom line is that it's impossible to manage people's expectations when you don't know what they are. It boils down to the fact that people frequently neglect to speak up and express their needs, hence expecting others to keep at it until they guess correctly. I know some of the things that irritate my husband, but I can never keep up with all his pet peeves and annoyances. I try my best to be personable and offer good food and service, but some people are difficult to please.

Therefore, I have concluded that "managing expectations" is a bunch of hooey. If you want your expectations to be met, then let them be known. Don't pussy foot around things of importance and bring problems and concerns up as they occur. Don't wait until your glass spills over before bringing problems to people's attention. Most importantly, don't have a passive aggressive "I plan to pretend to ignore you to get your attention until you realize I'm mad at you for some reason" attitude. That kind of behavior should be left behind in high school.